Archive for the ‘ Communication ’ Category
These are my least favorite words in the English language! In my office, I bump into it all too often. It is an ordinary belief that sets up enormous disappointment. I don’t understand why so many people are enchanted by this complete fabrication of what it means to be in a relationship. I see this [ READ MORE ]
When couples become parents, it can become all to easy to lose track of Who are we without the kids? The US gets lost because it’s the easiest plate to drop. Taking time out just for the two of you at least twice a month really matters. If couples aren’t talking to each other about [ READ MORE ]
Forty years ago I wish someone would have explained to me that the core of my in law problems were about their values of what was proper. I remember my brother in law observing “You guys are like oil & water.” This did not offer me any understanding. Being a therapist gives me a terrible [ READ MORE ]
The State of Wonder is the newest book by Ann Patchett. She is famous for her novel Bel Canto which helped me understand more about Opera within a setting of a terrorism attack. “I write about what I don’t know because I love doing research.” she announced when she spoke on 11/21/11 at the Drue [ READ MORE ]
It was our 38th anniversary this month & I was grumpy my husband had bought tickets to something called Moth. I didn’t understand what it was, even after reading the email he forwarded. It turned out it was one of the most delightful evenings of the year. Moth is an organization that encourages “true stories [ READ MORE ]
It’s the prickleyness of defensiveness that gets in the way of communication. It’s quite a task to wade through defenses, because they are sticky, like muck in a swamp. My work is to help people be more open & vulnerable with each other, which is the opposite of defensiveness. We can’t see the other person [ READ MORE ]
“This (Washington D.C. ) is the most emotionally avoidant city in America.” David Brooks So many young people question whether it’s even possible to have better than an average marriage. All kinds of people stay in half-baked relationships. People drift away from friendship without a single word of explanation. A parent has no real clue [ READ MORE ]
“All of us are caught up in what Brooks calls ‘the loneliness loop.’ What drives us ultimately, is the need to feel understood by others.” 3/7/11 Newsweek article on David Brooks & his new book The Social Animal Sometimes the impossibility of communicating accurately is overwhelming. Feeling understood is basic to connection. Everyone longs to [ READ MORE ]
Intimacy requires the authenticity of disagreement, conflict and sharing the painful bits of life. It is impossible to be close to anyone without the truths that emerge from conflict. How can you really know anyone if you just settle for the superficial? Facebook & texting are tailor-made to keep things “light”. Who has 600 friends? [ READ MORE ]
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